How to Kill Your Ghost

By Rowan Gladish

T.W.: Partner Abuse

In the mornings

When I make my coffee

I feel your breath

On the back of my neck.

In my rearview mirror

As I drive to work

I catch just a glance

Of your cold eyes.

On my lunch break

Your text tone rings

On someone elses phone

And I flinch.

In the evenings

The TV blares unending

But it can never drown out

The sound of your voice.

At midnight

I wake up in

A cold sweat and feel

Your arms around me.

Tightening until

I can barely breath

Smothering me

Never letting go.

You whisper that

I will always be yours

You will follow me to

My grave.

It's just a moment though

And then I'm alone

Heart beating so fast

I'm sure it will burst.

The ghost of you

Is haunting me

I know you’re long gone

But you never really left.

But I don’t haunt you

You moved on

And I did too

I'm happy.

So why do these scars

Feel like fresh wounds

Why does every voice

Sound like you.

Someday I'll learn

How to kill your ghost

And maybe finally alone

I won't feel so lonely.

Rowan Gladish is a 20 year old bisexual aspiring author of fiction, creative nonfiction, and poetry. She spends her evenings reading and writing, when she’s not distracted by her keyboard-obsessed cat or catching up on netflix. Rowan lives in London Ontario, and is currently completing a degree in criminology.

Instagram: @rowan.finally.writes